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There are 'no perfect words' for talking to kids about mass shootings, child psychiatrist says

TOPSHOT - Families hug outside the Willie de Leon Civic Center where grief counseling will be offered in Uvalde, Texas, on May 24, 2022. - A teenage gunman killed 18 young children in a shooting at an elementary school in Texas on Tuesday, in the deadliest US school shooting in years. The attack in Uvalde, Texas -- a small community about an hour from the Mexican border -- is the latest in a spree of deadly shootings in America, where horror at the cycle of gun violence has failed to spur action to end it. (Photo by allison dinner / AFP) (Photo by ALLISON DINNER/AFP via Getty Images)
Allison Dinner
/
AFP via Getty Images
Families hug outside the Willie de Leon Civic Center in Uvalde, Texas, on May 24, 2022. Grief counseling was being offered at the center.

Tuesday's mass shooting at a Texas elementary school where a gunman killed 19 children and two adults, and injured many more has become the deadliest event of gun violence in the U.S. so far this year.

Dr. Javeed Sukhera, chair of psychiatry at the Institute of Living and chief of the department of psychiatry at Hartford Hospital, wants to remind people to take time for themselves in processing the attack.

We cant pretend like every day is a regular day when these horrible things continue to happen, and when people are continuing to heal from the trauma of the previous thing, he said.

Sukhera said recent events can be especially sensitive for 窪蹋勛圖厙 communities that feel the echo of the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting in 2012.

Some people are going to shut down, some people are going to start going into hyperdrive, going through the motions even quicker, because theres also no one-size-fits-all when it comes to coping, he said.

Experts say traumatic events like the Texas shooting can cause confusion and fear among children, even those experiencing it from afar.

All we can do as adults is to remind our kids that we love them, that theyre OK and that theyre safe, Sukhera said, and that were here, were present if and when they need us.

Sukhera, who specializes in child psychiatry, said kids will process the mass shooting in different ways.

It can be really scary sometimes as adults to try and find the words, so the best thing we can do is to free ourselves of that burden, to remember that there are no perfect words, he said. If we create the space, our kids can actually take the lead and let us know where theyre at and what they want to talk about.

Resources for families

Families can find more guidance on helping children cope at the and other health organizations.

AACAP offers these resources:

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network

  • Start the conversation. Talk about the shooting with your child. Not talking about it can make the event even more threatening in your childs mind. Silence suggests that what has occurred is too horrible even to speak about or that you do not know what has happened.
  • What does your child already know? Start by asking what your child/teen already has heard about the events from the media and from friends. Listen carefully; try to figure out what [they know or believe]. As your child explains, listen for misinformation, misconceptions, and underlying fears or concerns.
  • Gently correct inaccurate information. If your child/teen has inaccurate information or misconceptions, take time to provide the correct information in simple, clear, age-appropriate language.
  • Limit media exposure. Limit your childs exposure to media images and sounds of the shooting.
Nicole Leonard joined 窪蹋勛圖厙 Radio to cover health care after several years of reporting for newspapers. In her native state of New Jersey, she covered medical and behavioral health care, as well as arts and culture, for The Press of Atlantic City. Her work on stories about domestic violence and childhood food insecurity won awards from the New Jersey Press Association.

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SOMOS CONNECTICUT es una iniciativa de 窪蹋勛圖厙, la emisora local de NPR y PBS del estado, que busca elevar nuestras historias latinas y expandir programaci籀n que alza y informa nuestras comunidades latinas locales. Visita CTPublic.org/latino para m獺s reportajes y recursos. Para noticias, suscr穩base a nuestro bolet穩n informativo en ctpublic.org/newsletters.

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窪蹋勛圖厙s journalism is made possible, in part by funding from Jeffrey Hoffman and Robert Jaeger.